They’ve gone and changed up the editor and I am not sure how this is going to work, so here we go.
It is Sunday. The weather has been stellar as of late. Not too hot, with a breeze. Folks are eating it up. Already, some of my friends are talking about what they are going to do this Winter. A good plan decided ahead of time is always good.
I was out on time. And all the pieces came together which was nice. We had people aplenty for set up which took little time. Which meant I had ample time to hear a first step sitting outside amongst the trees in the church yard.
And as usual, we sat a good compliment. Sunday’s are a smooth operation. Everybody has a job,and we read from the Big Book. My Bottle, My Resentments and Me.
This story is the first of fifteen stories comprising the third section of stories from the back of the book. Tonight’s story was a full on assault of the senses. This section of stories tell some of the worst stories of what alcoholism did to our writers, and also how the miracle of recovery the program is. Stated simply, if these folks can get sober after such depravity and misery, then anyone can get sober.
The last line of the story is the clincher …
“Stick around until the miracle happens.”
It has been a full weekend. I got to spend time with my guys. I hit a few meetings, and had dinner with a friend prior to last night’s meeting. The Long Goodbye continues.
I’ve been on the fence about several things going on in my groups. And in talking with my sponsor, he is one with few words. He has given me simple direction with a few words, and not needing many. Do what you do best, trust God as He speaks and let God sort the rest out.
On the way home I spoke to an old timer friend of mine about said issues. And he told me that you can please some of the people some of the time, but you can’t please all the people all the time. Do what you do best, and don’t worry about people and their perceptions about you or any given issue.
I know I am powerless over people, places and things, it just irks me that people have formed assumptions and presumptions about me in their heads, and that has informed what they say to me and how they treat me and how the group is affected. Some folks are cross at me because of what I do, like I had any choice in the matter. That is the way the meetings panned out. We all have our roles to play and our jobs to do. It seems that some people are not happy with the way things are, and so they think by stirring the pot they can affect change, whatever change that might be???
I am not in this for glory or ego and it isn’t all about me. And you’d think that men with lots of sobriety would know that. Which only goes to show that even if you have decades of sobriety, and you go to meetings, doesn’t mean that you are necessarily sober.
People are going to do whatever they do, without regard for your feelings.
And so I need to trust in the process and let god sort it out. UGH !!!
We are coming up on my 21 year anniversary of my diagnosis of AIDS on the 8th of July.
The 8th of July at 12 noon to be exact.
And we are halfway through the calendar, and this is the month of my birth to boot.
Harry and I share the same birth date. Do you remember the date ???
That is all for now.
More to come, stay tuned …