This has not been an easy week for some. Even though there are communities willing to go to any length to help them, if they don’t engage then nothing is going to get better.
Nothing Changes if Nothing Changes …
Tonight, we talked about “The Slipper,” and what we can and cannot do for them. We read the words of the founder who said that you can’t talk a slipper round.
Some in our numbers think otherwise. Some, who are fearless and devout to their friends, will go to any length to “talk them round,” whether they want to hear it or not.
Hoping against hope that at some point, all this talk would lead somewhere productive.
However, I know this … I can’t get you clean or sober.
I am not God and I am surely NOT your savior. BUT I am willing to try at least. I am just not going to watch my friends go to their deaths with hard narcotics.
There are people in my life today, that I am ALL IN with. They might not know this until their time comes, and that time has come for some.
A friend, who has been on the bubble for a long time, I’ve engaged at times in the past, but not so overtly, more covertly. But the time has come to step into the fray and do what I think is best for their welfare and lives.
I am not a Narcotics Anonymous guy, because the only narcotic I have in my history is cocaine. And that was on a “is it available” basis. Because if you had it and you were willing to share, I was willing to participate.
When it comes to Heroine, MDMA, Crack Cocaine, and other assorted alphabet names, I am woefully ignorant.
But I have a friend who has a perverse and very sick death wish.
Addicts across the board, whatever your evil substance is, we are ALL or NOTHING kinds of people. In for a penny, In for a pound they say.
I have thrown down all my cards tonight. I asked some serious questions of a friend, and put it to him plainly, that I was in his court and that I had his back.
And I meant that 100%.
Also tonight, we heard one of our young men share about his best friend, who has been in and out for a very long time, since they were teenagers. Neither were in at the same time, and when one was out, the other was in, and back and forth.
A couple of weeks ago, they met, after a long absence, and the friend was pounding the alcohol, and in a matter of days, that friend was DEAD.
Not only was there a tragic loss, but the questions like, could I have done something, and why didn’t he listen, and why is he dead?
Then the thought of a drink and a drug rose onto his dashboard, and my friend considered it wisely. Having good friends and someplace to go, he avoided that slip.
To his own benefit.
I never talk about this, but we are loosing our young people to drugs and alcohol, more than we like to admit. And there is not a damn thing we can do about it because as one of my friends spoke tonight …
I CAN’T MAKE YOU GIVE A SHIT !!!
That’s the problem with addiction. When we are sunk into it, not one word or one action or any program of recovery is going to be able to help you, if
YOU DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU !
My friend who has that sick perverse death wish, when he is IN IT,
HE DOESN’T GIVE A SHIT, BUT THE BLIND OBLIVION AT THE BOTTOM OF A DRUG.
And I sit here and think that last night, he could have died. This morning at 9 a.m. my phone rang with a friend asking me where he was, and what happened ?
When I left him yesterday evening he was clean and sober. By midnight he was in a crack den smoking crack with some very unsavory people.
By then he knew he was in over his head.
FUCK I hate addiction so badly.
All I can do is offer my friendship and my skills at listening.
That is all I can do.
Alcohol will KILL you outright. If you pound enough of it, the body will go into free fall, and begin to shut down and you WILL DIE.
Marijuana is innocuous, it may not kill you, outright, but the black hole that follows, will swallow you whole and take you out.
Narcotics are an entirely different beast. Some start off slow and methodically. But once the train leaves the station, we are all in, with no sight as to the end of the line.
The higher you escalate on the train of hard narcotics, your death is exponentially greater, the higher you climb on that ladder.
Narcotics WILL KILL YOU.