Thursday: By Their Fruits You Will Know Them


With 500 meetings to choose from in any given week, I’ve chosen to travel into my old neighborhood of Verdun. A very “Salt of the Earth” area of town. People live simple lives of charity and neighborliness.

It is an easy jaunt from downtown to Verdun via Metro. I find getting to a meeting there, is easy. One Metro, a 5 block walk from the station, and you’re there.

There is OLD sobriety in this room. It’s one of the major reasons I moved my Thursday meeting from Old Westmount to Verdun. I am learning what sobriety is supposed to look like after fifty.

I may not like what I am seeing. But, I go there nonetheless.

Long sober people have their ideas about me, and that is fine. I’ve burned a few bridges over the years with people and places. My sober observations still matter to me, because I know many of the old sober folks, from all around town.

They may not like me, and tonight a good number of old hens, who I have history with, came to hear the speaker tonight, and only the speaker herself acknowledged me before the meeting, where everyone else walked by like I was not sitting out front with everybody else. And those old hens ignored me all night long.

No love lost there.

The last time I ran into them was at a friend’s mum’s funeral service, that I went out of my way to attend, because some of my long sober gay friends, require presence. And I am always present for my friends, in good times or bad. Because that’s what we do for each other. We stand up for one another when times get tough.

Over the years, I’ve seen a lot in sobriety. And I have shared about it. And people do not like when I “over share,” because I see it as warning my readers of my observations about people, places and things.

I mean really, how does one learn if you don’t write it down for posterity so you can look back at it, and see the lesson from any given meeting.

I find it interesting how some of the old gay men, whom I am acquainted with, look me up and down with disdain. God, I will never be as stuffy and arrogant as some of them.

A meeting is a meeting. And tonight, our lady who spoke was 44 years sober …

44 years … There is some serious sobriety.

What do I know about sobriety at 44 years ?

Sobriety is directly related to the effort and time you put into it.

  • Good sobriety, is an effort.
  • Traveling to meetings is an effort.
  • Joining a group is an effort.
  • Becoming part of is an effort.

We heard all the suggestions we all hear when we first come in.

If you want good sobriety, then you better put into it, what you want out of it.

I am doing what is necessary. I am making an effort to see new people, and hear new stories, from people, who don’t travel into town for meetings.

You may not like me for one reason or another, and that’s fine.

Not every alcoholic likes you. And won’t give you the time of day. And that’s fine.

Treat others, as you would have others treat you in return.