Monday: Can It Really Be That Simple ?

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Five years have passed, since I met Bob and Lorna here in Montreal, at the Dorval Round Up. They, members of The Atlantic Group, in New York City, had been invited here to share their methods of working The Book, and their brand of sobriety.

It came as a surprise to me, when at one point, Bob looked at the crowd, from the lectern and raised The Book in his hands and asked if people actually read the book ?

People shook their heads … No they didn’t.

He then continued with a question …The Prayers, that are in the book, Do you say them, The Prayers, he questioned ?

People shook their heads … No they did not know the prayers from the book.

After that talk, I went up to Bob and asked him what he meant, because I was twelve years sober at that point and had read the book many times over, and worked series of steps as well. Nobody took the constituent parts of the book, and ever broke them up for me, giving me a plan of action to follow.

People in Montreal Sobriety are like … Aw, we’ll do it later…

Bob said to go to the book and write out the Third, Seventh, and Eleventh Step Prayers on paper and put them where I would see them. Pray them, say them, recite them daily.

By then, a friend had given me the very same prayers on little cards, which I did attach to my computer, so I would see them all day and night.

Everything starts with prayer and meditation.

Just prior to the Round up, I met some of my long time women friends, now, working steps with their women, then. They read the book before meetings, and they were doing this 10th step, which turned into an arranged phone call the next morning.

I Had no idea what that was all about, but many guys were intrigued.

Months went by, prior to the Round Up, watching this go on in front of us. We finally asked some of the women to sponsor us, so we could do it too …

They said No to that request.

Bob said to me, at that Round Up, that if I prayed every day, like I meant it, or would learn how to mean it, that my life would change.

It did … About six months later.

A Vision for You, comes to mind.

I finally knew, what it was that I had to give. One night my phone rang, and not long after I met my now best friend, too. Since that time, only my best friend and my friend Juan, still exist in my sober working life.

But I know what it is that I have to give.

I’ve got five years of working the Book, the Steps and the Prayers, the way I was taught to do, by people, who were not from here.

I talk about this process to people at meetings, and they cannot seem to wrap their heads around this Very Simple Process.

The Big Book, is NOT Rocket Science.

It took Bob and Lorna to show me how it was done. I learned that process, and I have refined that practice, over the last five years. I took another soul through the book this past fall. He’s sort of disappeared since.

I use the tenth Step and the eleventh step daily myself. And I show new prospects how to write a simple inventory at night, even if they aren’t at step ten or eleven yet. Because if you begin to practice prayer and meditation, early on, you will know how they work when you finally reach that point in your steps.

Basic simple inventories are good for simple, on the ground conversations, later. Because they give us something to talk about. Like a simple template.

Our young people cannot be bothered to ponder simple templates.

That’s just too much to process for them.

And I heard it again tonight. One of my young people, whom I have reached out to over and over, tell us how insane he is in his head and that he needs simple direction to get himself on the beam, and I just stared at him incredulously …

Really ? What have I been telling you over these past six months ????

Numb and Dumb …

The Book is not rocket science.

The message has been lost on complicated minds.

Sixteen

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A month shy of my sixteenth sober anniversary comes on the ninth day of November, when my fellow, Juan, picks up another year sober.

The rat has been unusually quiet, as of late. I am much more serene than I have been in a long time. Over the past little while, I’ve consolidated my energies. And to this date, I have deleted people, places and things from my life that I just don’t have the mental or emotionally energy to put towards any more.

The joys of being 50 I guess.

I am a bit more selfish with whom I socialize with. I’ve paid my sober dues to people in the rooms for the last ten years. Many of the dues I paid were never reciprocated in any way, shape, or form. I don’t owe anyone any more favors. And I said that to a lady friend not long ago.

My friends have repeated the same refrain that they believe I need to hear and that is:

You have sixteen years of sobriety. That’s nothing to smirk at. It’s a good chunk of time. You know what to do. You have a routine that works, and people who love you. Stop worrying about what everyone else thinks or says. You aren’t them. Your experience is unique in the rooms and nobody can take that from you. They are correct.

The last eighteen months have been terribly emotional for me. I hear Lorna in my mind speaking the words of: “I’ve never been so ANGRY, RESENTFUL and BITTER in my life in sobriety, after all these years.”

But I am not fully on the page with being totally, “Compassionate, Understanding, and totally 100% Serene, just yet.” But I am working on it.

I do not trust entire communities of people. I know them more intimately than they know themselves. Because I have studied my friends like lab rats for the entire run of my sobriety.

Wisdom sets in little by slowly. I do know this for sure: Hindsight is my greatest teacher. People have come and gone from my life. People have died, people have gone back out and drank and used. And with this much time, I can safely say, looking back at all these goings on, with regards to decisions and actions, there were patterns of behavior and patterns of decisions, inaction, or purposeful action, that led to what each of them did.

I know what that looks like today. Very Useful Lessons about Sobriety.

When I speak to people, they really don’t want to hear my critique of their sobriety. So I write it down. I write everything down. I pay good money to keep this private place safe from prying eyes. I paid a price in allowing every Joe and Charlie to read my rantings and ravings.

Over sober time, one grows up in many ways. One begins to see the patterns as they reveal themselves to you, the longer you spend in a particular meeting. I am soberly invested in three communities now. I really pay attention to my friends. Not that they admire that attention I give them, and some of them would rather I just keep to myself.

I do that now. Because not many people care for my brand of sobriety.

They want lip service and no responsibility for their actions or decisions. Which keeps them numb and dumb. I don’t know why people like it that way, when the program of recovery IS a program of action. People don’t want action, they want simple stupidity.

I am SO OVER simple stupidity.

We spoke of willingness. You either get it or you perish. We spoke of spirituality and spiritual principles. You either find them or perish. You practice what you are told to practice on a daily basis, or you perish, and you languish in numb and dumb.

I hate people. I dislike people. I resent people. I do not trust everybody equally.

When we come in, we are supposed to be kind to everyone. Allow everyone a little latitude. We are supposed to be understanding, because when I came in people were all those things to me. Sadly., members today are not so kind and giving.

I saw an old sponsor tonight for the first time in a long while. The very same man who used to demean me and call me derogatory names. I fired him because of this practice. Why are double-digit sober men such assholes, I ask you ?

Tonight, I said hello and the first words out of his mouth were:
Well, you have some grey hair don’t you !!!

I’ve lost thirty pounds. I look better than I have ever looked before in my life. Not since twenty-five years ago looking. He did not notice that. He noticed my grey hairs.

UGH !!! I hate men.

Alcoholics are sick people trying to get well. Some of them, are trying to get well. Others, on the other hand, are just plain SICK. They are numb and dumb. And many of those sick double-digit sober men have legions of long sober women, who continually blow smoke up their asses, as they pledge their loyalty to them and laud them as paragons of sober living. I tend to disagree with these people, vehemently.

I have a close-knit group of friends now. Some of my best friends have a fraction of sober time that I do, yet they are men, in my age group, who love me for me, who have stood with me on the firing line and supported me through my angriest phase of sobriety.

I know how people have treated me over the last year, which is reflective in which meetings I go to today, who I socialize with and who I give my time to.

My friends are suffering. Not many of them know how to pick up the 2000 pound phone. That has always been an issue in the rooms. We ALL have SMART PHONES, yet we don’t necessarily use them as they were intended to be used.

I follow a specific pattern in sobriety. I do specific things. I offer the same council to everybody. I offer simple suggestions, which, when you put them all together, will give you a complete recipe of how to get and stay sober.

Many of my fellows don’t believe a word I say in public. They just shake their heads in dismay, like, is this guy for real ? Is it really that simple ?

Yes, it is that very SIMPLE…

This far along in my sobriety, nobody has come into my sober orbit, with anything new to try. Meaning, I have not met another sober member from anywhere else, who has a new fangled way of working the program. I am still running on the New York, Atlantic Group, Big Book Sober Program, I learned from a group of folks over years ago.

However, I did work another round of steps with my Mennonite an Mormon Elder Spiritual directors this past summer into the fall. That was very fruitful. I finally ticked ALL the shit I have been sitting on for all these years, which has spiritually freed my soul to sing joyfully.

It has been a year since my Elder Christensen went home to Idaho. Spencer is now at Brigham Young University in Utah, studying medicine. I love my Spencer. He is the smartest spiritual young man I have ever met. That’s what struck me from the very first conversation we had when we met over a year ago, now.

He gives me faith and he gives me love of Heavenly Father.

You cannot go wrong with a Mormon Elder in your life. At least I can’t.

I’ve learned that there is light after the darkest of days. I’ve learned that I can feel, and walk through those feelings, damned what anybody else thinks about me. And I did that over the last eighteen months, and I did not drink over any of it.

Because I followed a strict sober recipe.

Go to meetings. Speak honestly. Do service. And fuck all everybody else in the room.

All along this journey, people feared me and avoided me like the plague. Nobody from the meetings I had been participant in, said anything supportive to me, at any stage of the game. Not One Soul offered me friendship nor companionship, or even kindness.

They just let me come and go, rant and rave, and not one of them did anything to help me ease the Dis-Ease I had walked through for so many months on end.

And I hate every last one of them. They can all go fuck themselves.

I stayed sober and I grew up, in spite of my emotional and mental problems. And I survived to see my fiftieth birthday and survive twenty-five years living with AIDS.

I AM a survivor.

Despite what anyone else thinks, says, or believes about me.

Today, I could care less what people think of me, because for a long time, I harbored resentments about those very same people because they ignore me in public and are uncharitable and unkind to me in front of others.

Now I know, they are just the same old numb and dumb sick alcoholics.

Sixteen is just around the corner.

Praise God I don’t have a desire to drink or use.

Friday: Willingness

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It is definitely COLD outside. It is a breezy, cold (-8c/w.c. -16c) We broke out our cold weather gear, scarfs and gloves tonight. It was a quick transit out and back.

I had to double-check my dates earlier today, and quickly organize a chip and cake for one of my guys tonight. Luckily, I had a special chip to give and on the way out bought a card, cake and utensils.

The reading tonight spoke about human will and its value. Willingness became the topic of conversation. We all had our stories to tell.

I know that trusting myself, and what is right and good, took a long time to learn how to trust, and believe that what I had to do and did do was, actually, the right thing to do.

Back in the day, when I needed constant supervision and assistance to learn how to survive a death sentence, Todd was that sound “mind and body” in my life.

Everything he taught me, all those years ago, are still in play to this day. I know today that if I do not know what to do, I close my eyes, and I return to the original lesson that taught me what to do.

I needed someone in my life, to the degree that Todd was in my life, for as long as it lasted. As long as he was looking over my shoulder, I was good.

When he moved away, and I was alone, I could not make the link between what I learned from him, and what I needed to do to carry forwards that practical knowledge. When you leave a fully structured existence and one returns to the real world outside, making that very important connection is crucial.

I failed at finding and making that connection work for me. I just could not find it, in front of me, by myself. And in time, as the messaging and people changed in my life, I walked out the doors of the rooms, taking my will back with it.

I told my friend Dave one of my sordid stories about my slip, before the meeting, sitting with my friend who took his chip tonight. Neither had ever heard me tell that story before. And for the life of me, I cannot fathom how I ended up the person I had become, insane, addicted to drugs and putting myself in situations that could have ended up very badly.

There is a God. I am sure of that today.

When I came back, I was no longer alone. I turned my will and my life over to the care of God, as I understood Him, in the people who helped me clean up that second time.

When I moved to Montreal, I did the right thing, FIRST.

I connected with a room and its people.

Women make the world go round …

I count my blessings that the group of women I turned my life over to, that first year, did what they could to make sure I stayed sober. My rehab counselors, the women in my Home Group, and the many people, men and women, I met along the way.

I am working on my anniversary post right now.

For a long time, in sobriety, I did not trust myself with making decisions, that I did not run past at least a handful of people, before I acted on anything. I did not trust my head nor my decision-making skills.

Early on, I was faced with one drama after another. The shit just kept coming, one day after the next. I was sober a little more than a year, I had begun my university career and my husband was mentally ill.

I stuck to the routine I learned how to do since day one.

I hit a meeting every day, sometimes more than one meeting a day. I did service. I took care of my family, to the best of my ability. I did not really have time to think, but while at a meeting, I learned what I needed to do to NOT DRINK, that day.

As long as I DID NOT DRINK, everything else would fall into place.

I strung days, weeks, and months together, that wound up years.

I learned how to trust God, in trusting my friends.

That plan has played out to my advantage. But my trust in the fellowship and many of its members has fallen to the lowest approval rating in all my sober years.

I’ve never felt such anger, resentment and bitterness towards other drunks. Because that is what they are, just a bunch of crazy drunks.

I know that I do not want to be like any of them. And I also know, what the voice of God sounds like, because like we are told, constantly, that:

If you want to hear the voice of God, then go to a meeting.

Today I trust myself. More than I have ever trusted myself before.

There is a God and I am not God.

Thanks be to God for that.

Friends celebrated two and three years tonight. There was cake.

We all laughed and had a glorious night.

Step Eleven says that: Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying for the knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

If sobriety has taught me anything, it is that a Spiritual life and Spiritual practice make everything better. As long as I stay out of my will, and connect daily with God’s will, everything will work itself out – in God’s time.

God’s time is perfect.

We surely need the perfect to guide us, in today’s world of utter despair and insanity.

The world is coming apart at the seams.

This is what dishonesty does to the world when it exponentially explodes out of control.

Thursday: “It’s Ok … I’m GOOD”

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We hear many things, when we get sober. Many of those little things we hear, over our time, in the rooms, is Good Sound Advice …

If you take away the drugs and alcohol, the problem still exists. That problem is US, and the grey matter that resides between our ears.

The drugs and alcohol are just a symptom.

It is important that we pay close attention to the newcomer, at their first meeting, or those coming back from further experimentation.

Tonight we heard that, we need to pay attention to those folks in the Double Digit sobriety range. We know, in our community here, that people with double-digit sobriety are JUST AS LIKELY, to go back out, as someone with little time under their belt.

The warnings are the same. We hear them spoken over and over again.

  • Get to a Meeting
  • Do Service
  • Join a Home Group
  • Connect with others
  • Tell the Truth – Always
  • Work your Steps
  • READ the BOOK
  • Learn Rigorous Honesty

Some of us, have experiences under our belts that many people do not. And that little factoid is “Personal Mortality.” We are all going to die, at some point. But life can turn on a dime in sobriety, and some of us get smacked upside the head with a terminal illness.

When that happens, we do one of two things. ONE, we go off the deep end, and we prepare to die, we give in, we suffer and we drink. and we DIE, or TWO, we turn to those who know us and love us, and we fight to live, we work, DAILY, Not To Drink.

I heard a familiar phrase tonight… “It’s OK … I’m Good…”

Something I have learned at this stage of my game is that “feelings are real” and that sobriety is NOT a cakewalk, all the time.

Shit Happens.

We learn a great deal about the people around us, when Life Goes South …

We learn, quite easily, THOSE we do not want to be like. That is a really great lesson, in the rooms. If you show up at a meeting, we must be good to everyone, because you never know what battle is being waged in their lives.

But there are those, “Who are Constitutionally Incapable of being honest with themselves.” And sometimes, it is those people who push those buttons we have within, and words are said … And we know intimately that we do not want to be like them.

People suffer in the rooms, because they choose to suffer, needlessly, or there are those who suffer, because of honest struggle, with either emotional, mental or medical problems, not of our own making.

Many of us grow up with having to be “The Strong One.” Never admitting frailty or that we have fear or pain, or that we are having a hard time. That is a serious problem, when we get sober.

If we are always ON – if we always ACT like we have our shit together, all the time, when life gets real, and we find ourselves on the bitter end of life and we are suffering, IF WE DON’T ADMIT THAT LIFE HAS BECOME DIFFICULT AND WE CANNOT MAKE IT ON OUR OWN, that we need our friends, and we don’t tell them as such, that is to our own peril.

The rooms provide. Not always to our specific needs. But there are those, Good, Long Sober folks, who are there, like the North Star. Ready, Able and Willing to Love us.

Warts and All …

How do we find these people ? We go to meetings. We connect. We learn to know our fellows, beyond sitting next to each other in those same chairs, night after night.

Because if we DON’T connect, and we suffer alone, and life gets real, and there is no one there in our lives to carry us when we cannot walk alone, life gets really tough.

The warnings are there. Spoken in such a way that everybody listened.

You go to a meeting. And you keep going to meetings. When we are feeling good, When we are feeling bad. When we look good, and When we look haggard and poor.

If we don’t connect and stay connected, we are disconnected at our own peril.

You can do anything, just as long as you don’t drink.

I know, my brain, is not someplace I like to go alone. For many, we get sober, and we gain some time, we do the work, and at some arbitrary point, we decide that “We are Good, that we are CURED … ”

That little internal message is the death knell for people, all across the spectrum.

Because once it begins playing, and we believe our internal messages, the story goes: Ok, I’m sober a while, I’ve done the work, It’s OK, I’m good.” The next piece of information goes like this … Ok, I’m Good, I am cured.

What happens ?

I’m good, so I don’t have to go to meetings any more, as long as I don’t drink.

I can attest to you that an alcoholic who just does not drink, is MORE dangerous, than someone who is actively drinking. If you remove that alcoholic who is sober, from their routine of meetings, and you set them loose with themselves, the end is nigh …

We are going to go ONE of THREE places:

  1. We are going to go back out and drink or use
  2. We are going to go insane, or
  3. We are going to kill ourselves or someone else

A dry drunk is dangerous to themselves and to the people around them, especially, if those people around us are children. Sons and or Daughters.

If we don’t STICK to Meetings, religiously, and we DON’T heed the warnings as we are hearing from the chair, we are SUNK.

100 % SUNK.

There are not many people in the rooms that I trust 100% with my shit. Because I know how people treated me, when I was in the thick of sober suffering at fifteen years sober.

There were, and ARE, a handful of men and women who loved me through my pain, because I kept showing up. I kept making coffee, I kept putting down chairs.

People with time, NOTICE people who stick around. Sticking around means ONE of TWO Things … They ONE, either need that service because it is what we learn to do in ALL cases, or TWO, shit is going down in their lives, so you better pay attention and be PRESENT.

I know my friends, intimately. And I know, by action, or sometimes, by inaction, that they really need to connect and stay connected, because they are on that illusive bubble.

I know now, what I know, because I walked through a forest, not long ago and now I am on the other side. I know the warning signs. I know what I did. I used the sign posts, the slogans, I stayed close and I did what I learned to do when I came in almost sixteen years ago.

All those little things we hear when we first come in are still in play.

And it may not come to pass, and it may come to pass, sooner than you think, but if you ignore suggestions, and those little things we plug into conversations, if you don’t listen or you ignore the locally posted signs, there for your own survival, You do that at your own peril.

Shit happens. And if you are smart, you will be honest, ALL the TIME. And you won’t drink over it.

How can we be honest all the time ? We find those people who are honest with us, and in turn we can be honest with them. Find them.

Because one day, those people will save your sobriety.

And most likely, Your Life …

Tuesday: Significant Horizons: Valerie Plante

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Sunday was our municipal elections here in Montreal. The incumbent mayor Denis Coderre was facing an uphill battle against newcomer Valerie Plante.

I voted for Valerie Plante. She won the mayoral election.

Denis Coderre spent million upon millions of dollars on beautifying the city for the 375th anniversary. He cashed in on the E – Race which stripped many business people of business when their terraces were rolled up for the entirety of the race prep – race day – and race tear down. Millions of dollars lost in revenue and sales.

Traffic is a nightmare, that is, if you drive, which I do not.

He could have spent much of the monies he spent on beauty, on the actual citizens of Montreal, who need more help than they (read: We) are getting.

The vote was stacked against him, as Sunday wore on. In the end, Valerie Plante won the vote for mayor here in Montreal.

I could not be happier for her.

She has made some serious promises to the city, and on November 16th, she will be sworn in as the First Female Mayor of Montreal, in 375 years.

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Monday night we celebrated 72 years of Monday Central, as a meeting. Monday Central began by the esteemed Dave B. Who’s story appears in the Big Book.

Gratitude in Action – Fourth Edition – page 193.
The beginning of Quebec Sobriety in 1944.

After several early incarnations and locations across the city, one of those locations was right up the street from home at the Old Forum location.

Where rent was $10.00 a week, but he meeting was asked to leave that location when members were found up late after hours playing cards and having fun …

I guess late night card playing was against city rules back then.

My friend Yves spoke. I know his story, having heard it previously. Monday night he spent an inordinate amount of time on the transience of life, back in the day.

What does a fifteen year old kid, upon leaving home, do with his life ?

He travels from Coast to Coast to Coast, drinking, drugging and getting into all kinds of trouble.

Upon settling in Montreal, finally, and gaining employment at the Old Royal Victoria Hospital, he meets his match in a doctor who tells him straight, that he really needs help, and this doctor, in his own way, saves my friend’s life.

In January, 2018, he will reach twenty-nine years.

I am thirty-two days out from my Sixteenth anniversary.

I will celebrate on the 14th, seeing that the ninth falls on a Saturday. My best friend is coming up for our main celebration on the 15th. at the Friday Night meeting.

My friend Juan in just a week away from his 3rd. Anniversary on the 11th of November. He will pick up his chip the following Friday at the Friday Night Meeting.

The weather is turning cold. Very cold, Very quickly. We will Dip into the Minuses later this week, and snow is even on tap, if all goes according to Environment Canada.

More to come.

Friday: Significant Horizons

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Do you realize just how fucking lucky you are that you are in the fellowship

One of my friends, a very wise man said that tonight. We work with others, because it helps US stay sober. Most of us, have a very low batting average, when it comes to people sticking and staying, in the room.

People are suffering. And they, tonight, openly admitted such truths to the rest of us.

I know, that if I don’t know what to do, or where to turn, or whether I am coming or going, I stick to the basics. Most people shake their heads when I repeat this advice in open community, but it works …

If I don’t know whether I am coming or going, I make coffee. I put chairs down and set up tables. I have keys to the church and I use them religiously. I am always there, early. I know that if i show up early, others will show up early too.

I turn my will and my life over to the care of my higher power, (read: My friends), every day. I know that they have my back. Sadly, those same friends, who are struggling right now, don’t think to call me … go figure …

Our stories are well told. And not earned. Our particular suffering gives us insight to each other, that people, in the outside world, just do not have. Our shared struggles gives us the ability to help each other in ways, we will not find outside the rooms.

The city has begun rolling up the Terraces, that have been open all summer long. The weather is growing colder by the night, and soon, very soon, I imagine, the snow will begin to fall.

NOW is the opportune time to get people connected to the system that works for many of us, sooner than later. Because if we do not act now, numbers will definitely drop off.

As is the case, in this time of year, as nights grow longer and the weather gets cold, people begin to calculate just ow much time it takes them to make a transit from home to a meeting.

AND they will find every excuse NOT to show up.

If the weather goes south, and snow begins to fall, people will think to themselves, Ah, it’s cold and snowing and I can’t bring myself to head out to a meeting.

And we remind them this fact …

When you were drinking and drugging, how often did you brave a freaking snow storm to score a drink or a drug ???

People tend to forget the lengths they went to, to SCORE.

The meetings are getting Solemn. And Deep, and Difficult.

I can’t make someone show up, nor can I force them to trust me. Not many of my kids trust me with their lives just yet, so they struggle from one day to the next, when I offer them simple suggestions they just look at me askance …

Like, Really, Is it really that simple ??? Why yes, it is just that simple.

It’s obvious that they really don’t want to go to any length to get and stay sober.

But the alternative is also an option. A good number of my friends are looking at the stark alternatives to coming and showing up. They know what the flip side of this sober equation is.

To Drink or to Drug.

My friend reiterated tonight that we forget, or don’t fully realize just how fucking lucky we are to have the rooms and the fellowship. My friends really don’t have a clue about being lucky.

Our resident old-timer man said tonight that “WE ARE THE LUCKY ONES.”

It took a long time for him to Get That Fully. YEARS and YEARS.

We are lucky, we have each other, we have the rooms and we have a WAY OUT.

I may not have ALL the answers, but I do have a way of life that works.

Our old-timer also said that, “If you want to hear the voice of God, come to a meeting.”

The fellowship is easy. It is not rocket science. The book lays it out simply.

If you read the book, and do what it says to do, in the order as the steps appear, you too will get sober, despite yourself.

People are just not listening to simple reasoning.

They’d rather walk around in the dark grasping at straws, and fumbling, when really, all they have to do is pick up that 2000 pound phone and show up early.

How freaking difficult is that advice ???

Alcoholics are self-centered to the extreme and we abhor authority and direction, but when we come in, and we let go and let God, we find safety, within that very same framework the fellowship provides for us.

Simple direction. Simple suggestions. A simple program of action.

People just do not want to put in the effort, time and care.

And they will suffer for their inaction.

At least I will stay sober during the holidays, because I know what to do, even if my friend do not. And they might bitch and complain about me doing so much service, but it needs to be done, or there would not be a meeting to go to, or coffee to drink and books to read.

If service is not done, where would we all gather on a Friday night ?

A good friend took her Thirty Year Cake last night and she mentioned that at Thirty years, she had reached the point where she saw Significant horizons in her life.

It really take A LOT of time in the rooms to have these observations and realizations come to pass. I know certain things at Sixteen years, almost.

I have reached, also, certain significant horizons in my life.

Horizons are on the way, as long as we stick and stay.

Just keep coming back.

One day at a time.